An up-close photo of bees on honeycomb.

The Good Life: More Ways Your Work Adds Value

A former coaching client and I reconnected on a catch-up call. It was great to hear how well his career and his life had progressed. During the call, he mentioned that his good friend, Marc Schulz, Ph.D., was the co-author (with Robert Waldinger, MD) of a new book, The Good Life and How to Live It. It describes the most recent findings of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, work that has been going on for eighty-four years. I ordered the book immediately. The authors present their findings in an incredibly readable way. They also share results from several other longitudinal studies that are consistent with the Harvard results. These are truly powerful findings, as well as replicable – the gold standard of science. The bottom line: “Positive relationships are essential to human well-being.” (p. 29). I will leave it to you to review the book in order to see…

Could Your Coaching Help Save Us?

In today’s post, I argue that the work that you do has potentially enormous value that you may not yet have recognized. Let’s start with something a bit frightening. (Please don’t head for the exits. I know that there is too much to fear these days, but stick with this post. It goes somewhere!) A volunteer in a community organization to which I belong shared this article. It describes a new kind of warfare, cognitive warfare, which is designed to disrupt whole societies without firing a shot. Then, on March 30, 2023, the Washington Post published this article, describing how Russia is doing just that. Both articles are important, but are long and not that easy to get through. Here is the gist: Cognitive warfare uses recent advances in psychological and neurological science to create social media, chatbots, and the like, to sow fear and divisiveness. The goal is to…

Text-image. In light grey in the background, it says EQ over and over again. On top of that in black text it says, "team leadership, supervision, culture change, relationships presentations".

Coaching Models and Emotional Intelligence

(See my challenge at the end!) Twenty-five years ago, I was beginning my evolution from psychotherapist to executive coach. I had a lot of thinking and learning to do. That need became apparent as I tried to imagine going to an organization to offer coaching services. The following very short conversation came to mind: Dana: “I’d like to offer my services to your company as a coach to your senior leaders.” Decision Maker: “Really! That’s interesting. We’re actually in the market. How do you go about your coaching? What is your focus?” Dana: “Ummm.” In response to that nightmarish imagining, I did what all of you have done. I thought about what models I could l use to inform my approach to coaching. Which ones, I wondered, best fit what I wanted to accomplish? I had learned as a therapist that having several models in my repertoire was essential, as…

Confessions of an Introvert

I am, by nature, on the introverted side of the scale. Many coaches tell me that is true for them as well. Introverts find marketing more difficult than extraverts. At least, that is what they may expect. After a career of building a thriving executive coaching business from nothing, I’d like to do a little myth busting by sharing some stories. Introverts can be great marketers. Let’s review what introvert means. It simply means that we “refuel” by having time to ourselves. Big social gatherings are not our preferred evening out. We like time at home, or with a small number of friends. We are likely to be introspective, a good trait for a coach. (A coach without self-awareness is a disaster.) Introvert does not mean that we lack social skills. We are able to establish rewarding, deep relationships with people. We just don’t have to be with them all…

A cartoon image of a frog jumping out of a pot of boiling water. The frog is saying, "I'm outta here!"

Coaching in the Age of COVID

Put a frog in boiling water and he will jump right out. Put the frog in cold water and then turn up the heat, and he will cook to death, not noticing the slow change in temperature. We’ve all heard this, but I read recently that this is just wrong. Frogs are smarter than that. But people? Maybe not so much. Over the past three years, COVID has changed our lives, even for those who never had it. The boiling water in this case is the generalized increase in stress that we have all experienced. Stress from fear of an unpredictable invisible enemy. Stress from reduced social contacts. Stress from having to put off needed surgery. Stress from having to teach our kids at home – while working! Or having to go to work, just waiting to get sick and maybe die. Stress from shortages. Stress from seeing loved ones…